Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
it wasn't lemon gatorade
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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