So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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