Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Even my vagina gasped.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
