so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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