She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
