I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
he had hair everywhere except his balls
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize