So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
