There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
