I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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