They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
