trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
