coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
