wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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