I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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