he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
