i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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