i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
