My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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