But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize