You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
