I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
