David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
P.S. I can't hear my feet
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
two words...techno handjob
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Randomize