I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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