he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
meet me or not, i'm out of control
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
