is your mom at the bar?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Congratulations! We have a period
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
