Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
