I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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