Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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