I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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