Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
You took a bar mat shot.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
