dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
