Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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