Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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