he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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