porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
