I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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