im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
