i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
