when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
