Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
