God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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