yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Randomize
