A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize