So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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