They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
