just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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