Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
i now understand why vodka
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
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