he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
