what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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