I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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