He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
